I haven’t written as much about running lately because I’m not sure what to write. Other than that I really do not like winter running, and I kind of wish I wasn’t signed up for an early spring race (Rock N Roll DC on March 16), so I wouldn’t be stressed about running. I like having a race on my calendar as motivation, and typically running is a stress relief, and I usually love training plans, but things have been happening kind of in fits and starts lately.
Part of my problem is that I loved marathon training, and wasn’t ready for it to end when it did. I have been assuming that now that my stupid hip/glute issue is (mostly) fixed, I should pick up right where I left off. That every run would be effortless and joyful and increasingly speedy, since through last August/September, I was gaining speed with each run. Of course, it’s just not that seamless. The fall flew by so quickly that I never really realized how much time had passed, even though the days I spent not running felt endless at the time.
I’ve been trying to take a more laidback approach to training and run more by feel, and how it fits into my life, rather than to strictly adhere to exactly what is on my schedule. Every week that I think work/life can’t get any busier, it does. I want to run 4-5 days a week and cross train and go to yoga and pilates and try spinning and barre and all these other things…and yet I know that is part of how I got injured in the first place. I need to learn to rest – both physically and mentally.
So my January runs generally kind of sucked. I’ve done easy runs, hill runs, long runs. I hate layering up. I hate my face freezing. I hate skipping runs because it’s a bit icy. I hate treadmills. I hate running in the dark cold 6am mornings. I hate that the cold makes me run at a faster pace than I can maintain for 8 miles. I hate that I feel slow. This past weekend I was sick with a cold or virus, which meant I missed my long run and got more negative about it all.
Enough. Today, finally, I had a decent run. I think I got faster last summer because of hill running. So I’ve been running hills again for the past few weeks, even though I feel slow and lumbering most the time. Today I was still slow, but not AS slow. More importantly, I felt like I loved running again. I thought that after almost three months of an off-and-on frustrating break from running, I would by dying to run again. And I was, but for much of January, in practice, it felt off. Finally, finally, I feel normal again. Here’s hoping this feeling sticks around.